Pulling the Oars

I do think about how it'll affect this afternoon, being up so early.

Lydia has been restless, crying out in her sleep for mommy, but without a physical need I can see to tend to. Judah's fever seems to have broken sometime in the three dark hours since I last laid a cheek to his forehead, and maybe it's relief that has me awake. 

It must be for a reason, though. 

Prayer time in the wee hours has an intimate feel to it, a blanket in the night without the listy need-stating of too many daytime prayers. The urgency is still there, but its gentler; it's appointment without the tension. He has something for me RIGHT HERE.

The sense, I've described it as paddling in a canoe. There are times on the river when the water's surface is glassy dark, but the paddler can feel a new current rushing underneath, a new direction tended toward without the oars slipping in. Fighting the current is just going to frustrate my (admittedly weak) planning, controlling tendencies, and likely leave me beached.

But where is He taking me?

It could be said that each person's life is in a constant state of flux, whether or not she recognizes it and whether or not she embraces it. God seems to be teaching me a phrase in this season: "There is no coasting." But AM I trainable?

(Photo credit Judah, with thanks for the reminder to wash my windows today.)

While wandering around the internet this morning, I read from a young woman walking through dark days of cancer and chemo that her emotions, if allowed to direct her days, always lead her astray: God's Word is the horse, and her emotions are the cart. God's Word HAS to lead, and her feelings MUST follow, by the nature of these too-often separate things. 2 Corinthians 10:5 struck me in the Amplified Bible translation: "Inasmuch as we refute arguments and reasonings and every proud lofty thing that sets itself up against the true knowledge of God, we lead every thought and purpose away, captive to the obedience of Christ..."

Yeah, not what the world teaches.

For a reason, though.